It's been a while but I might be posting on this more regularly now due to Clint letting it slip that my friends have been talking behind my back and think I'm a drama queen due to my Facebook posts. So apparently I either am just going to a ton of stressful stuff or I just truly don't have any true friends like I thought I did.
So no more Facebook posts from me, except for the random pictures. I guess I just gotta get used to being more of a loner - friends don't text or call me, i haven't tried to either recently and school and work are literally turning me into a nutcase loner that nobody wants to be around. My parents and brother don't even care to call and check in on me. I have Clint and right now I ever so barely have him - been pushing him away due to my moodiness from being so stressed and overworked. Hopefully seeing how I really only have one friend that reads these posts on here maybe I can eliminate the talking behind my back and maybe I'll have friends that actually want to do something with me without them knowing that I know about it. It's my biggest fear, worry and nightmare all come true which is having my friends talk behind my back. So if I seem distant that's why - I won't let anybody in again until I feel like I can trust them.
When I saw your post on Facebook earlier, I wanted to see if you were interested in me bringing you some coffee or something. I know you are busy trying to catch up on school work. Sounds like you have had a rough past couple of weeks or so. :( I hope I haven't lost your trust.
ReplyDeleteClint said that he exaggerated that a bit in the heat of the moment due to me being a really nasty brat and ticking him off. That they were just concerned about me. Idk I just haven't been myself here lately. We could get some coffee sometime if you like or a bite to eat. :-) you haven't dear. After junior high and high school and my experience of being bullied, I immediately assume the worst and completely shut down and become even more paranoid that what I normally am. I can't seem to help it.
ReplyDeleteI get that way too. Especially if I'm tired, sick, stressed and overwhelmed, or all of the above. It's easy to let things get under your skin that way. I do it and then after I've had time to rest, I realize I was just cranky. Give yourself some time to rest, if you can. :)
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